• Zachariah@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    “I don’t want to sleep with you.”
    is often
    “I don’t want you to exist.”

    • MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz
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      5 months ago

      But not always. I’m absolutely behind the point you’re making about some people, but if someone wants you dead, it’s usually not subtle.

      I’ve met people who use this logic to turn absolutely vicious towards people who have otherwise shown nothing but kindness.

      Smoking is an instant nope for me, and for that I’ve had some girls react like I think smoking makes a person abhorrent and undeserving of love.

      (No, I’m not saying trans people can “quit” being trans the way smokers can quit smoking. Just saying that even if a piece of logic is valid, it should be applied with care.)

    • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      Well there isn’t an inherent connection between those two ideas. So I take it you’re looking for reasons to be suspicious

    • Mango@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      Not from me it isn’t!

      I need someone to explain the male gaze thing to me better than the last person did. They made it sound like it’s bad to like what’s good.

    • 1984@lemmy.today
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      5 months ago

      Maybe in the heads of trans people but not really. I understand it’s easy to think everyone hates you, but if you believe that, you are no longer open to seeing the alternative and you see what you expect everywhere.

      You can exist just fine but for some reason, it doesn’t seem enough to exist. Quite often trans people feel they have to showcase their sexuality, instead of just chilling and being cool with it like everyone else.

      • MentalEdge@sopuli.xyz
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        5 months ago

        I made a similar point in that if you look for hate, you can end up finding it even when it isn’t there.

        But this argument is weird:

        Quite often trans people feel they have to showcase their sexuality, instead of just chilling and being cool with it like everyone else.

        That type of “often” is an illusion, since you can’t know how large the group of people that don’t make themselves obvious is.

        And plenty of straight cis people engage in the exact same behaviour, broadcasting their sexual identity. It’s not something everyone wants to do, but it’s absolutely something everyone gets to do.

      • jawa21@lemmy.sdf.org
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        5 months ago

        The amount of hate I receive daily (verbal usually, sometimes physical - I’ve had rocks thrown at me during Atlanta Pride) let’s me know that it isn’t made up. It got to the point about 5 years ago that I stopped having a social life in exchange for safety, and I am someone that “passes” well.

        This is why voice training is so extremely important for trans people that can physically do it. Bigots tend to group up and absolutely will let you know that they hate you by doing everything from harassment to calling the cops to get you away from them if you get clocked.

        You have almost verbatim made the “not all men” argument and shown that you have no real idea about the issue you tried to address.

        Quite often trans people feel they have to showcase their sexuality, instead of just chilling and being cool with it like everyone else.

        What the actual fuck? This sounds like something you decided was true in your head with no actual evidence to support it. It is actually extremely offensive and generalized IMO.

        • 1984@lemmy.today
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          5 months ago

          It’s just based on the trans people I have met so it’s highly subjective. For example, I saw two trans people on vacation in Italy wearing dresses, tons of makeup, tight clothes, open chests, and walking in a line like fashion models, looking straight ahead as into a camera.

          That’s what I mean when I say “showcase their sexuality”. They are proud trans people who wants everyone to notice them.

          I’m sorry to hear you are getting hate. Nobody deserves to be hated for how they look. But at the same time, we live in a extreamly superficial world. Quite an awful world if you ask me.

          • flerp@lemm.ee
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            5 months ago

            What is wrong with that? People can dress however they like and if you don’t like it you can just not look at them, not really rocket science.

            Nobody deserves to be hated for how they look. But at the same time, we live in a extreamly superficial world. Quite an awful world if you ask me.

            Guy… you’re the one being superficial… you don’t get to blame your behaviour on “the world” that’s extremely pathetic. Own up to the fact that it is people like you AND you yourself that make the world superficial. Or are you too afraid to take responsibility for your own behaviour?