cross-posted from: https://linux.community/post/906126
I’ve observed if I say nothing (because I simply don’t know how to react), opinionated people think you agree with them, which I don’t. I don’t care.
what I want to tell him, next time he starts ranting: ‘I don’t care what you think, leave me alone’.
However, I may have to work with this person in the future, so what about ‘you don’t have to tell me everything you think, most of the time I don’t pay attention’ and if he keeps pushing it ‘it’s tiring working with a person who has to rant to feel good, it’s boring and makes me ignore you, which is a problem, because we work together.’ And leave.
What about ‘everybody has problems, maybe talk to a therapist? I cannot help you’.
Or maybe simply leaving when he starts his rants?
Sorry man, I’m in another state of mind right now. I can’t even begin to think about what your saying atm
lmao I thought for a second this was just your comment about the situation, not your advice on what to say
Unless you want to push back (clearly you don’t), I wouldn’t even acknowledge the topic or what about the topic makes you uncomfortable
“Hey man, this is a bar conversation. I don’t feel comfortable talking about stuff like this at work.”
I work in the same office as my best friend and I’ve told him similar - even though our politics are very closely aligned. Yes, I agree it would be funny if Trump shit his pants when he falls asleep in court. But I don’t want people to hear us talking about that
Or, instead of a “bar” conversation…
This is a lunch conversation. And only go if you’re willing to listenand he agrees to foot the bill! Lol
Depending on how many good restaurants are around and what your free time is worth…but depending on the topic, I’d take a free lunch for that! Lol
Nah because then you actually have to talk to them at lunch
Better than after work. And sometimes free food is free food!
I prefer “Let’s keep our conversations professional.” It lets him know that you’re there to work, not BS.
Realistically, though, this is a problem for your manager to handle.
Plot twist: that coworker is pushing the Agile agenda.
Do you have a moment to talk about the gospel of scrum?
Hahaha, oh fuck, the Agile Acolytes are out!
Agile’s great and all, but sometimes it’s just applied to shit where it just doesn’t help.
Scream “I NEED AN ADULT!” and run as fast as you can in the opposite direction.
That’s saved me for my entire life.
Just pause awkwardly for a second, long enough to be felt but not long enough for them to start talking again, and bring up something unrelated
It’ll hit them with the feeling of social rejection, but without the confrontation or giving them anything to latch onto. Nothing to get offended about or argue against, there’s nothing to react to there
It might take longer, but it’s not a request to stop - it’s training them to not bring it up. It’ll make them uncomfortable to talk about it - even if they force themselves it’ll be uncomfortable for them
(Unless they’re high on the spectrum, in which case direct is better all around)
I’d probably go with something like…
Hey.
(Leave a pregnant pause to let it sink in a bit)
I’m sorry[.] I can’t be the good listener you want when it comes to this/these topics [at work]. I know you’re very interested in this/them, and I value our relationship as colleagues. I can’t think about this stuff at work, so I’d really rather we stop talking about it/them, please.
Mastery of the art of awkward, is to invoke it as a means of protection for absurdity & curiosity tend to be the only defense against campaigns of idiocracy
“I don’t want to talk about that” is perfectly honest and neutral.
There’s two kinds of issues: instance and pattern. The first time or two, it’s instance. You deal with those with specificity. Something like, “I would prefer not to talk about this subject with you, please stop”.
If it persists, then it’s a pattern problem. You deal with the pattern, not the instance. “I’ve asked you not to talk about subjects like this in the pant, but you haven’t stopped. This makes me feel like you don’t respect my boundaries and it’s making it difficult for me to work with you. Why are you doing this to me?”.
You can escalate from there, and this might involve management involvement but at least you’ll have the clarity of having made the situation clear before it gets there.
Honestly though, unless the coworker is actually deranged, they’ll be mortified when they find out they are making you uncomfortable and they’ll stop right away.
Maybe go to HR for help and advise?
HR is there to protect the company, not help you.
He’s ranting about windows or mac users, right?
They said issues that they don’t care about. If that were the case, they would logically only agree. So that can’t be it.
Where in the post did OP state that thye cared about operating systems?
