esp if you’re one of the devout ones who think they’ve been really good

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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    2 months ago

    Some of them are

    I’ve been bedside at more deaths than I can accurately recall. Most of them followed some religion or another, and there were a dozen or so that expressed peace and/or joy at the thought of the afterlife promised to them. Some of the others hoped it would be there, but expressed it with some degree of fear or doubt. The rest were honestly either not in their mind at all, or were otherwise unable to communicate towards the very end.

    Christians, most of them, for what that matters. Three Muslims that I recall because you don’t find many here in the rural south. All of them were awake and alert towards the end, and expresses still having faith, though they seemed to focus more on making their last days be about saying goodbye. No clue if that was them as individuals, or a facet of Islam in their lives.

    The ones that were the most outright joyous were what you might call a bit obsessed with their religion, but it didn’t seem to stay along denomination lines with the caveat that Catholics aren’t much better represented here than Muslims, so protestants made up the majority of my religious patients, period.

    Only ever had one Hindu patient that was dying, and he never mentioned it at all. He just wanted to cuddle with his wife and enjoy good food.

    But shit, one the happiest people I ever sat with as they were dying was a secular humanist. Dude was all about going out with a smile. Kept himself just high enough to feel no pain, and was otherwise essentially partying until the cancer made that impossible. Then it was just enough medication to keep pain minimized while allowing him to be aware and able to talk. But he said he was happy with his life, and expected death to be a welcome cessation of the bullshit that comes with a body.

    I think the most “impressive” Christian I sat with was an retired evangelical preacher. Despite his religion, the guy was very zen about it. “The Lord will reach down for me when it is time. I’m just going to enjoy what I have until then, and praise his name with my last breath.” But it wasn’t some kind of crazy thing, it was said very calmly, very matter-of-fact. He shrugged a little when he said it, like it was no big deal when he went.

    That guy was of one of my favorite patients tbh. We’d go walking, and just chat about whatever our minds brought up. Wasn’t always deep stuff, sometimes it would just be swapping stories about ourselves. Never preached at me, not once, and I had let him know I was essentially atheist, but also Buddhist despite that. You’d think a retired preacher from the kind of church he was in would be all up my ass, but he never even hinted at that kind of thinking.

    I came late to when he was passing. It was late at night, and he was a morning patient for me. He was pretty much non verbal the last two days, but he would reach out to people you hold their hands, and smile.

    Some people really, truly believe. They can believe so deeply that death is either a momentary inconvenience between them and their afterlife, or is a very welcome gift from god. There’s no doubt in them, no fear, but also no desire to accelerate it.

    Anyway, it’s obvious that nobody can speak for the billions of religious people in the world totally. Even as many deaths as I saw are a drop in an ocean of death. But it’s certain that religion can bring about what you’re asking.

    • akakunai@lemmy.ca
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      2 months ago

      I don’t really have anything to add, but thanks for writing this. It’s quite insightful.

  • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    No matter how good the afterlife is, it’s not going anywhere. Life, however, is unique and finite and so should be savored.

  • Illuminostro@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    That’s the reason the prohibition against suicide was introduced by the Catholic Church: people were killing themselves to go to Paradise. Why wait?

  • Toes♀@ani.social
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    2 months ago

    Careful that’s how you end up drinking the blue Kool aid.

    The ending of life is a sad thing, it can be frightening to imagine losing that control.

    Faith is one form of trying to capture that control. Please try to cherish the life you have here and make the most of it. For most I suspect there’s no need to rush it.

  • RadicalEagle@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Yeah. As someone who really likes thinking about metaphysics I’m really excited to die and see what it feels like. That being said I also really enjoy living and I’m not in a rush to die. It’ll happen eventually and I want to try to do as much as I can while I can.

    Everyone should be excited to die, not just religious people. Being excited to die means you lived a good life that you’re satisfied with.

    • RustyShackleford@literature.cafe
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      2 months ago

      Being excited to die means you lived a good life

      The problem is, most of the current generation is well aware they haven’t lived good lives. Not to mention, the conundrum of living longer implies a chance for an accumulation of more misdeeds. Personally, the most likely scenario is almost everyone becomes aware there is likely nothing afterwards at some point. Religion is more there like the bumpers for kids cosmic bowling, ensuring zero gutter balls. Keeping you playing, until the day you’re old enough to remove them and pay taxes, revealing life is a subscription, and childhood was a free trial all along.

  • Jaytreeman@kbin.social
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    2 months ago

    I agree with you.
    Either the person isn’t a ‘good follower’ and isn’t going to the good place.
    Or they don’t actually believe. Because there should be no fear or apprehension about going to the good place

    • z00s@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      People who believe in God will still scream during a fatal car accident. Belief in religion has nothing to do with the natural survival instinct.

      You’re trying to set up an idiotic no-win situation that has no bearing on reality.

      • Jaytreeman@kbin.social
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        2 months ago

        A fatal car accident is different. Could be a shock scare or just not wanting to be injured.

        Belief in god has no bearing in reality.

        Having said that, my grandfather outlived my grandmother by 10-15 years. On his deathbed, he was holding some marriage pictures. He was looking forward to seeing her. Guy believed 100%. Still makes me tear up thinking about it.

        • z00s@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          “it’s different”

          No, if a test has no possible win outcome, then it’s not a true test.

          “Heads I win, tails you lose” is not proof of your ability to predict a coin toss.

          • Jaytreeman@kbin.social
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            2 months ago

            100% it’s different.
            Just because a movie has a jump scare it isn’t necessarily a scary movie. There’s a difference between some existential dread and ‘boo’.
            I’d argue that the accident is a startle response with body horror mixed in.
            Some people are scared of death. Doesn’t matter the cause. That’s what I’m talking about. It’s 100% different than a fatal car accident.

            • z00s@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              By your logic, all Christians would commit suicide with a smile on their face.

              Stop trying to straw man with unrelated metaphors

              • Jaytreeman@kbin.social
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                2 months ago

                You’re starting to get it?
                That the true believers aren’t afraid of death. The believers that are scared at the concept of dying aren’t actually believers at all.

                • z00s@lemmy.world
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                  2 months ago

                  You don’t get it. Your “test” is not a fair test. Your making shit up to justify your feelings. You’re either 14 and think that you’re smarter than the rest of the world, or your just really, really stupid.

                  Either way I’m not going to continue arguing with a pigeon who thinks it’s playing chess.