When I was in 2nd grade, I was stuck in a corner for participating too much. This character flaw has followed me all my life. My ex told me people didn’t like me because I shared my thoughts too much, and I just got feedback from my boss about the same thing.
The thing is, I’ve tried to stop my whole life. I only participate maybe 10% of the time, and I generally try to let others speak first unless no one is speaking up. But I’m still getting this feedback. I’m like a bull in a china shop, knocking down everyone no matter how careful I try to be.
The only solution I can come up with is to assume no one wants to hear from me and disengage. Stop caring, stop thinking, and stop participating altogether. I already feel isolated from everyone. This is just making it worse. I think I have to face the fact that I’m not welcome in any degree.
Any other ideas?
My 2 cents: try to become a moderator of discussions for a while. People are talking? Instead of contributing, try to watch them. Are there People who contribute more/less? Does someone have problems to get their turn? Do they understand each other? Try to make space for those that need it. By the end of the discussion, if there was something really important to the topic that noone mentioned, say it. This approach helped me a lot to become more aware of the multiple people conversation dynamics and in the end helped me with dialogs as well.