some straight guy i was friends with was obsessed with me. he only cared if i liked men and had a bf for some reason, and would ignore that i liked women. he would act like i was straight and that if i dated women, that just meant i was single and obviously interested in him.

  • FriendOfDeSoto@startrek.website
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    2 hours ago

    I think the simplest answer is that we humans can hold two contradictory opinions at the same time. There are people who can support free speech and then censor books willy nilly. There are people who believe strongly in a religion but brazenly violate its rules of conduct on the regular. There are people who know homophobia is wrong but still are homophobic. And if this man has the hots for you at the same time this may be his way of squaring that circle.

    I don’t know you. I don’t know him. Insert heaps of salt here. This doesn’t sound like a good friendship to pursue.

  • Ledericas@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    2
    ·
    edit-2
    2 hours ago

    sounds like hes one of those, that " can i turn her straight for 1 day and have sex with er" types of people, its definitely creepy. porn has given people too many wrong ideas.

  • artificialfish@programming.dev
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    6 hours ago

    I mean to me, if I’m trying to get with you, or while I’m with you, all I care about is if you like me or not.

    I think a lot of guys think that it would honestly be perfectly ok for you to go on having gay sex in your straight relationship. They aren’t threatened by another woman because that woman isn’t fulfilling the role they fulfill: sex with a penis. They also probably think you’d be missing out not to have both in your life if you are bi.

    Or they are just erasing. But sometimes the same behavior can come from completely different ideas.

  • AmidFuror@fedia.io
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    14
    ·
    14 hours ago

    It’s 2025, yet I automatically assumed Dr. Bollocks was a male. Not because of the doctor honorific, mind you, but because of the testicles.

    I will try to be more enlightened moving forward.

  • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    16
    ·
    15 hours ago

    Bi erasure comes in all flavours. Gay guys around me also often don’t believe guys can be really bi, just gay in denial, or closeted gays living a straight life. The B in LGBT+ might as well be the bigotry in the community for how prevalent it is.

    • LibertyLizard@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      edit-2
      15 hours ago

      Ironic because bi is the largest queer demographic but also the one that can blend in the easiest which hasn’t forced people to advocate for acceptance.

      • jol@discuss.tchncs.de
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        15 hours ago

        And is also a spectrum. Most people would probably be bi, if social pressure didn’t exist. It’s honestly weird to think that anyone would be 100.00% gay or straight.

  • JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    16 hours ago

    Sounds like a combination of homophobia/gay erasure and misogyny (I know what women want, not them) to me