To start: no, there are no “trusted male figures” in our lives. My brothers & father are all conservative, and I DO NOT trust them to properly explain things without shame and/or religious context.
My son knows the basics of reproduction, but I’ve never really explained what’s “normal” things for a teenage boy to go through… mainly because I don’t know!
I’ve definitely put it off, so he’s almost 14 and is much more physically mature than most of his peers (he’s got hair in places, shaves his face regularly, etc.)… but I’m embarrassed to admit that I know next to nothing about anything else…
Could y’all help me out? What did you go through that he should know about? What should I know about?
Many thanks to anyone who can help. Please don’t be unkind. Much appreciated.
EDIT: Thank you so much for all the advice so far!! Please keep it up!!
My son & I have very open communication & a very good relationship.
Maybe put a “doorbell” with a light in his room that he can see.
Might go low-tech and just stick my arm in with a flashlight or something.
Actually this is probably something good to discuss with him directly. Brainstorming ways of grabbing his attention in a way that respects his privacy together goes a long way toward earning good will, even if you make a mistake later on. Sometimes brain just stops working. My mom has always been good about respecting my privacy, but one day she just opened my door, something she never made a habit of doing and started talking… Right in the middle of some self-care.
As embarrassed as I was, we were laughing about it the day after. She was excited to tell me something nice is all, and I could trust her apology afterward because of our rapport. How could I stay mad?
Does his door have a lock?
I think maybe it should.