Oi I’m not wiping my manly butthole with those pink girly wipes. That’d be GAY or probably something equally incoherent.
I’d never heard of Dude Wipes, and I don’t get the point of them at all. I’d probably buy Gendered Butthole Wipes, though, I love the name!
Lol at the idea of gendered buttholes… like a dude burning down a California town celebrating his butthole’s gender reveal.
I mentioned Dude Wipes to my wife, and she said that they were popular with the young teens she works with. Apparently they’re not for your butthole specifically, but just general cleanliness wherever.
I remember reading somewhere that men’s buttholes are tougher than women’s and therefore more resilient to anal sex. It was in a thread though where feminists were complaining about anal sex being degrading and potentially injurious for women, so take it with a grain of salt.
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Liquid Death? It’s just fucking water. There’s already water in your house you don’t need a fucking can with a threatening name for it.
I heard the branding was to help recovering alcoholics, so they don’t feel like they’re “missing out,” and won’t stand out so much with a scary can instead of a water bottle/glass. So they can still crack a cold one with the boys and such.
I’d believe this with how much I see Steve-O drinking it on his YouTube channel. The dude made a point to drive a whole ass vending machine of Liquid Death across the country to his new home lol. At his previous home in California, it was apparently up against the coping of the half pipe in his backyard so you could do trick off of it.
That’s pretty cute. I support this.
eh I find their tall boys of sparking water have made it so I hardly drink alcohol at all now.
It’s worth $1.57 to fool my brain, and certainly cheaper than the same amount of beer.
I had heard that’s the point, to a degree, or at least to help people with a drinking problem not feel ostracized while out with friends.
I’ve heard of kids who have been too corrupted by drink marketing to drink water drinking liquid death. If it gets demographics who wouldn’t otherwise drink water to drink water I can’t get upset about it
Okay, but their teas are actually pretty darn good and not loaded with sugar. I agree about the water though.
(Although, aluminum is essentially infinitely recyclable compared to plastic, so is probably a better alternative to bottled water)
Hate to break it to you, the inside of cans are still lined with plastic. Still marginally better than plastic bottles though.
If you have a local filtered water supplier you can bring a large reusable container and refill water from there. That way you still get the filtered water taste but cut out shipping
My local filtered water supplier is the fucking city I pay taxes to and it’s just fine. I don’t understand why so many people are afraid of tap water. I can download fifty fucking years of water testing data. I can get my home water tested for free every year. And you still have these assholes out here who drink nothing but plastic bottled water because it’s $5 per case from Aldi. That shit should have at least $5 of taxes added to it which go straight to the municipal supply.
Nothing wrong with tap, it’s the best choice if your city has proper mechanisms to ensure tap water quality. Unfortunately not all cities invested in good infrastructure. Theres still a couple of US cities with either bad pipes or local water pollution
I’m not afraid of tap water but, in the city I live in, it tastes like pool water and I find that highly unpleasant.
while i am a proponent that different brands of water is different and there is a difference in taste, ill never defend overpriced water.
like you arent going to give me a bottle of arrowhead water.
Arrowhead is the nastiest
bottledwater ever. If someone gave that shit to me instead of just local tap water, I’d be insulted.It is tap water.
From the rustiest taps in the world. It’s so metallic tasting, I’m surprised it’s not a brownish orange color.
Costco seltzer packs are a much better/cheaper choice.
I hope you guys are memeing because getting passionately mad over guy branded stuff that we just find kinda neat is a new level of stupid I haven’t been exposed to yet. I want my asshole to smell like mint, so I buy dude wipes. I want canned water to cut down on plastic usage, so I buy liquid death. I want a burger that’s not made of animals so I buy a beyond burger. Beyond what? I don’t fucking know I just want a burger.
It’s not that deep.
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Why did you moo? Are you the cattle? Actual retard.
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Why ask if I am something only to then claim I am that very thing? You really have problems, guy.
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Dude wipes are the most toxic masculine bullshit product I’ve ever seen. Honestly who the fuck buys that shit except the most fragile male ego in the universe
Agreed. Stop flushing wipes, none of them are “flushable”. If it doesn’t dissolve from light manipulation when wet, it’s not flushable.
Bidet. Just get one. They’re like $30 and take 10min to install. Clean buttholes forever.
I’m sitting on a fine $700 one right now and it’s heaven. My real office.
I can’t even imagine what features $700 can buty you in a bidet.
Guess I was wrong about price… it’s $850 but it’s the Toto S550e. Bought it two years ago and haven’t regretted it at all. I’m actually going to have an electrician come out to install plugs in the other bathrooms to put bidets in all of them.
The one I have now also sprays the front area for the ladies to I can’t comment on that but might be why it’s so expensive.
The seat heats, the water is warm that sprays, auto open… pretty much all you need. I will say that as a dude on the taller side (6’ 2”), I really have to scoot my ass forward quite a bit so I’d probably find something else for my next bidet.
TOTO SW3056#01 S550E Electronic Bidet Toilet Seat with Cleansing Warm, Nightlight, Auto Open and Close Lid, Instantaneous Water Heating, and EWATER+
Ah man, you’ve got a Cadillac.
I had me an old Panasonic model at my old apartment that wasn’t as nice but goddamn if you set that MF to the strongest setting 🫨🫨. The thing would clean your ass, rectum and colon lol.
Ah that’s a lot more features then even the nice hotel in Korea had. The instant heat and all the automatic stuff is probably why it’s so expensive.
The second nozzle for vulvas is standard on even cheap models.
Bidets are great if you’re at home but if you travel you need something
I’ve tried to get them to install one at work, but they keep slapping that one down.
Have you tried toilet paper?
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You really don’t. Toilet paper does the job for 90+% of people, at least in the US.
And 90+% of the United States population walks around with shit on their ass. It’s gross.
To be fair, a moistened wad or two of toilet paper works just as well as “flushable” wipes.
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Fuck it unattended hose in someone’s yard
I liked the answer that I once saw here: “Real men do whatever the fuck they want.” No one cares about this kind of judgmental assholery.
Real men have painted nails when their kids say it’s time to paint nails
Yes, Real Men™️ fall for toxic masculinity marketing tactics. Real Men™️! Also, just your average mindless consumer regardless of gender but Real Men™️, too! Especially, Real Men™️!
Be Real Men™️
Not to go political but have you paid any attention to the number of supporters of the king of fragile male egos, their king? It’s a huuuge market segment.
I buy them because they smell like mint. I prefer them over normal wet wipes. I didn’t think this was such a passionate issue for people.
You also seem to be taking it really personally for some reason.
I buy the product, the comment attacks people who buy the product. I’m quite literally the target group. “For some reason”
Yeah same, I got ones that smell like Shea butter, they’re pretty nice. I mean if the store had other ones branded differently with the same wipes I would just buy those lol. I feel like the only ones triggered by the imagery are ironically the guys who are insecure in their masculinity and feel threatened by a literal moist toilette.
Turns out there are a lot of those people. They’re probably doing fine.
they’re probably doing better with cleaner buttholes than if these didnt exist
Anything other than a bidet, bonus points for charging more for having more ‘masculine’ advertising
If it gets men to take care of themselves…I’m for it.
REAL MEN HAVE SKID MARKS
/s
I know a guy that said he doesn’t wash around his ass when he showers because “that’s gay as hell”. I don’t even wanna know what kind of biome he’s got flourishing down there.
Sounds like the kind of guy that comes out of the closet in their 80’s.
They’re larger than regular wipes, and the chemicals are less irritating. Compare to cottonelle wipes which make my down there burn, and the choice is easy. These days I prefer crocodile wipes though.
So then call them “XL wipes” and put a line about sensitive skin
Pass that along to their branding coordinators. No one here can do shit about what products are named.
We can do a little bit by mocking the branding mercilessly.
I’m just pointing out how stupid it is, you can contact their branding people all you want on my behalf!
Who’s out there wiping crocodiles?!
when you have large hands and a large asshole that takes large messy shits, you need a larger than normal ass wipe. dude wipes is the largest asswipe on the market. no cap.
I’m a caregiver for a man who needs coaching through the entire bathroom hygiene process and I can say that in my professional opinion, Dude Wipes are terrible. They pull apart just getting them out of the package (see below), let alone when someone with dexterity issues tries to clean their butthole with them. He ended up with a poop covered hand after pulling the bits of pulled apart dude wipe out from his butt.
They are the largest “flushable” wipes, but are smaller than a normal baby wipe. Flushable wipes shouldn’t be flushed anyway, they’re terrible for every type of sewage system.
Fine, but now big gals with same need to buy “dude wipes.” Just call it heavy duty, or industrial strength.
Or Carl’s jr EXXXTRA BIG-ASS wipes.
Bio-Dome is pretty fun. And you get to see an early appearance of Tenacious D.
I love the D
you can quote me on that
Also jamming out to Voodoo Glow Skulls in a fuckin busted ass geo or whatever is a real mood. They certainly made trouble in that bubble.
Haven’t thought about voodoo glow skulls in a minute. BRB, gonna go see if band geek mafia holds up.
Album still slaps. Same few tracks worth skipping like love letter, but gonna keep it in summer rotation.
You listen to their 2021 album? I had no idea they were still active. It’s pretty good!
Woah! No, I had no idea either. Ima peep that.
After the nuclear apocalypse the only things left will be the roaches, Twinkies, and any band which has ever signed with Epitaph records.
tbh the extent of my Pauly Shore knowledge is that episode of Futurama where Fry thinks he and his former gf think they’ve been frozen again and it’s a post-apocalyptic year 4000, but it turns out that’s just what LA is like
I love the D - nyahlathotep@sh.itjust.worksYou guys ever watch the old tenacious d show on home box office
I still get the rocket sauce song stuck in my head. Ice cream trucks just started up around me so I’m singing it every day.
The only thing I know about Biodome is from Weird Al.
“Cause I had my tray table up, and my seatback in the full upright position!”
Hmm… It lost me at “Pauly Shore”, but got me back at “Tenacious D”… This is a puzzler 🤔
Noted, but I ain’t putting any money in that prick Stephen Baldwin’s pocket. Also, if you happen through Tucson, go check out Biosphere 2 in Oracle, AZ which inspired this film. Science, bitch!
Pro-tip: if you choose to wipe your ass with babywipes/gendered moist towellets… Don’t flush them.
Just to reiterate, even the ones that claim to be “flushable” DO NOT FLUSH THEM. It’s a damn lie and I don’t know how they keep getting away with it.
It feels like a part of that deregulation politicians keep going on about. Deregulation ruined the airlines and now they’re ruining our buttholes… when is enough enough?
What? But they’re flushable*, it says so right on the package.
* if your municipality allows it. No municipality does.
We really gotta regulate the use of that word.
Regulate? Sounds socialist and anti capitalist. Better just let them keep doing what they want for the sake of The Economy ®
Can you just put “flushable” on anything and get away with it? For instance if I made a “flushable” pillow case could I be held legally liable for anything?
Flushable bees!
Flushable rapid-set concrete.
It says flushable, which is true. It doesn’t say what happens to it after it’s flushed, and it doesn’t say it’s a good idea.
From the same blithering idiots who regurgitate “everything is edible once, huh yuk!” every time inedible mushrooms are mentioned.
get a goddamn bidet.
Let the poop dry on your butthole and then brush it off like your ancestors did for millennia.
they raped and murdered too. I’d like to think we made at least some progress in the last couple of millenia.
Reading this on my Apple Watch, while riding my Hoverboard, watching Bio-Dome in the background, and eating a wet-ass Arby’s sandwich I smashed into a quesadilla in my Quesadilla Maker… I can’t wait until it rockets through my intestines so I can use my Dude Wipes! 😎
Eating wet asses and smashing Dillas and cleaning up with wipes after? That’s quite the sex party you got going on there.
I don’t get the hate for Arby’s. The brisket sandwich and their sauce are good as fuck. Maybe it would have made a difference back when they first started and were like 5x more expensive than the competition (their signature sandwich was $0.69 when the next most expensive fast food was $0.10) 🤔
I have a standing theory that people that hate Arby’s used too much horsey sauce, or gets older dry meat repeatedly. I don’t love the place, but they don’t deserve that much hate.
-
Go to Arby’s
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Get their roast beef sandwich
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Stop by the grocery store
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Get REAL horseradish sauce
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Go home or wherever, put the real horseradish sauce on your roast beef sandwiches, enjoy.
Arby sauce and their “horsey” sauce are garbage. Their actual foods are mostly fine.
Is it wrong that I think the Arby’s sauce is kinda good?
It’s not something you can really buy as a condiment, but it’s good.
Try Carolina style BBQ sauce
Thanks!
With this info, maybe I can make my own beef & cheddar. Cook up don’t shaved beef, get some onion rolls for the bun, and use queso style cheese, plus some of this mystery BBQ sauce and it should be pretty close.
There’s not many Arby’s near me, so if I really want Arby’s, I basically have to make my own.
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The curly fries are good if you can get them hot and, y’know, cooked all the way through. Arby’s is very consistently disappointing as an experience.
I’ve heard people and seen videos of people comparing Arby’s curly fries to Jack in the Box curly fries and I’m over here like “they’re literally the same.”
Ohio’s weird, I don’t know that we have a jack in the box in the state
I had Arby’s one time, and it was terrible. I would go to literally any other fast food chain over Arby’s.
I had an ex who was so excited to take me to Arby’s for the first time. It was gross. I held my tongue as she went on about how much she loved their horsy sauce and cheese stuff, but it was nasty. She had terrible taste in food.
Yeah I fuck with Arbys, that sauce is dope and the Jamocha shake is pretty good too.
I have a thing for bad gas station food too though so I might not be the best judge.
I dunno, some gas stations have good shit. Had a pre-packed Italian sub from a Loves truckstop that blew most sandwich chains out of the water. Loves is kinda cheating as far as “gas station food” goes tho.
The best fried chicken strips I’ve ever had come from the
KrispyChester’s Chicken places attached to Chevrons. They put the grocery store and fast food options to shame.Chicken strips are exactly what I was thinking! We have a “Chesters Chicken” attached to some of the gas stations here that have these big battered potato slices, they’re almost a meal by themselves!
That’s what I was thinking of! Chester’s, not Krispy 🤦♂️
Ive heard of Krispy Krunchy chicken in a shell gas station before, i dont remember it being very good tho.
There’s a chain called Huey Magoos that is pretty good. Zaxbys is great too but the nearest one is like, a 2 hour drive from me
I had it confused with Chester’s Chicken. Someone else mentioned it and I realized that’s what I was thinking of. Krispy Krunchy is indeed the Shell one.
Well, I don’t go there for two reasons -
- Their vegan options don’t seem that interesting.
- They don’t seem to have a presence in the continent I’m on.
If you’re not willing to travel to another continent to get your food are you a Real Vegan?
We don’t take too kindly to vegans round Arby’s
vegan
What part of “WE HAVE THE MEATS” do you not understand? /s
It was more supposed to be a joke about the second reason being much more significant.
Edit: I think this was the first time I missed a black on white sarcasm flag. Oh well, it’s early in the morning, and there’s a first for everything.
It’s not top notch, but depending on what you get they have some gems. The buffalo chicken sandwich is super simple and good.
No, it’s not top notch. Is anyone else?
Does McDonald’s or burger king make the best burgers? No! Not even close.
You buy that shit because it’s there, not because it’s good. It’s just there and not something you hate. Good enough for Tuesday night I guess.
Something we agree on.
Arby’s is great! I need some beef and cheddar all up in here.
United we stand
It’s all just salty processed meat block. It’s absolute shit compared to the real thing. It’s like they are advertising fancy German brats and then serve you a hotdog.
Jumping on the “don’t use flushable wipes” bandwagon. Seriously, they can screw your home’s plumbing up.
For anyone doubting this is even possible for a product that is mass-marketed and available everywhere, look back a little over a decade. For a hot minute we had scrubs and soaps that had tiny little plastic beads in suspension to provide some grit. All those microbeads got flushed down the drain and wound up who knows where. That is until it was made illegal.
Now these are my kind of ads 🤩
The hoverboards are for kids as far as I can tell. Childhood just isn’t the same without some way to bust your face open. Parks got nerfed by a well-meaning child safety crusade that fixed nothing and ruined playgrounds; because the problem wasn’t that the playgrounds are dangerous - the problem was that kids are stupid and clumsy so sometimes shit happens and a kid will die tragically. It’s literally unavailable, that’s what makes it an accident.
Some of these kinds of things - especially “as seen in tv” stuff advertised by fumblebums - are actually intended for people who are partially or wholly physically disabled. But if they market it for disabled people then they’ll sell less of them and the price will go up, and because we live in
Americahell, the disabled didn’t make nearly enough to survive as is. So they market it to everybody with an over-the-top ad instead. Remember the Snuggy? Literally designed for people in wheelchairs and with mobility issues.The rest is just brand awareness bullshit and market expansion. Seriously, man-wipes exist because they’d hit market saturation and are trying to squeeze out a profit increase by targeting a different demographic. Because in capitalism, the line MUST go up. Brand awareness is just a way of saying “Hey! Pay attention to me, I’m Diet Coke! Don’t forget! Are you thirsty now? Pick me!” And the quest part? Both stupid trucks work because people are dumb.
Some of these kinds of things […] are actually intended for people who are partially or wholly physically disabled.
After I learned this, I immediately felt bad for poking fun at these kinds of products. Normalizing their use by the non-disabled, and depicting the products likewise on TV, makes it that much more acceptable to the intended audience. If this wasn’t the case, it might sting a bit as a gift for someone that really needs it. And then there’s the economy of scale effect you mention; nobody would get a Snuggy if they cost $100 each.
Awe… I like Arby’s. Their curly fries are easily on my top 10 best fastfood fries.
I’ve had Arby’s 5 times. In a wide variety of locations across the States while visiting friends or family. It’s delicious, which is why it took me 5 times getting food poisoning to stop eating at Arby’s.
The local Arby’s here has roaches and it’s well-known. People still go there all the time and the drivethru is always busy.
Extra protein, amirite?
Yum yum!
Sad fact: if one place in your neighbourhood has roaches you all got roaches.
Can confirm. The nearby Wendy’s also has them lmao
The fries are fantastic but not enough to justify the wet ass sandwiches
They sell them frozen in a bag now. So you don’t have to eat something that came out of an Arby’s kitchen.
A few years ago my friend’s father passed away. My friend’s mother continued to live in the house for another year or so. She never worked and had to eventually sell the house and downsize.
My friend had referred to her mother as a hoarder before. I’ve seen the reality TV shows about hoarders. But you don’t really understand just how bad the problem is until you spend several days helping your friend clean out their childhood home for sale, filling up several dumpster bags worth of… Stuff. Apparently the mother has always had some mental health problems and a shopping addiction, but spending over a year alone in that house drove her off the deep end.
We could have opened an entire new Harbor Freight store. There were clothes in sizes I didn’t know existed. My wife casually found a pistol just shoved in a random box. It was madness.
Came for meme comments, left with sadness and misery
My MIL once brought a trash bag full of clothes for my wife, from friend who didn’t want them. Most of them were brand new with tags still on them. We thought it was strange, but they mostly fit and we didn’t think too much about it. Next visit she brings two more big garbage bags of new clothes, and one of the bags had dirt (like actual earth/dirt) on the outside. It turned out that the friend was a shopaholic and had been stashing the bags of clothes under the house so her husband didn’t see, but she was running out of room, and was trying to make space.
We stopped taking the clothes. It felt like taking advantage of someone’s mental illness. Never met the lady, but seemed sad.
I grew up in this kind of house. My spouse retrained me. I didn’t know that it was weird for your living space to smell like urine.
Glad you improved your situation
I enjoyed the movie Driveways that in part is about cleaning out a hoarder’s house. Plus it’s got Brian Dennehy in it, it’s his last movie before he died.
Actually have and use that quesadilla press. Works well enough and saves a little time over doing it on the stove
What? Asshole!
Was gifted it for Xmas, felt hard to clean, the leg broke immediately and temperature was uneven. Glad you liked yours
Yeah qc sucks more and more lately
This image makes me want one. Two sides at a time?! Sick.
Also I love my Apple Watch. It’s sweet for seeing my heart rate go up to 185 after my first 1v99 PUBG win (before bots, thank you very much)
Fuck dude wipes though, that’s a ridiculous concept. Just get a fucking bidet and stop hating your anus (not you, person I’m replying to, but everyone reading this comment. Including you, if you don’t already have one!)
I have dude wipes and a bidet. Fite me.
Nah you got a bidet, you’re doing good
Fuck dude wipes though, that’s a ridiculous concept. Just get a fucking bidet and stop hating your anus
I just use baby wipes, they’re cheaper and not gendered, plus I already needed them for my kids. Haven’t taken the plunge on a bidet yet
Totally fair, I used baby wipes and just threw them away before my bidet. Bought a cheap cold water only bidet and it changed my life! It’s especially good for periods and cleaning for butt stuff. And horrid shits.
Are they biodegradable?
No, but neither are my kids’ diapers. The way I see it is there are far worse things I could do to the environment and far more impactful changes I can make on my life for the environment than consuming 3-4 packs of baby wipes a year. I’m sure I’ll convert to a bidet sometime but right now I’ve got bigger fish to fry
Something I’ve seriously considered is how you can just add a hose and nozzle “bum gun” to your existing toilet water supply valve and you just need to affix a little mount for it on the wall. Hardware stores have kits for this that aren’t particularly expensive.
It’s definitely much cheaper than a whole porcelain piece of furniture or one of those fancy seats that probably wants access to your Wi-Fi and an account subscription. XD
I noticed my in-laws had these things while we were house sitting for them, and dared to try it out. Weird at first, but(t) AMAZING.
Just get a fucking bidet
So I walk around all day with swamp ass. Pass, will continue to use regular, actually flushable TP.
Clean with bidet, dry with tp. Also uses less tp
Same reason I never shower after sweating. Why would I add more water. Study it out, sheeple!
Hey. I like my smart watch. I enjoy tracking my biometrics and being able to leave my phone, but still be able to listen to music, calls, texting, etc.
That said, I was also the kid who rocked a calculator watch in the 90’s, and I always wanted Dick Tracy’s watch.
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My biometric data is E2EE encrypted and only accessible by me.
I trust apple to actually keep that data private
If you chose to share that that data, or store that in the cloud, it’s E2EE / AES-256. Apple can’t decrypt it.
If Apple didn’t do this for the Health app, they’d be running foul of a lot of new and decades old laws about biometric / health data.
Also, there is little fact that Apple literally has no marketing segmentation products that utilize medical cohorts like this. They’re trying to sell an overpriced watch, accessories, and subscription services, not targeted ads.
Yes exactly. Like yes it’s certainly possible they’re not doing what they say they are but it would be a high risk low reward situation to do so.
I trust them a lot more than I trust an advertising company
Never trust any company ever.
I’ve got two choices if I want a smartphone I don’t want to fuck around with. I chose the better of the two, when it comes to privacy.
