I decided to stop making excuses a few years ago and just say when I’m not feeling socially up to it or there are too many people. Positive reactions literally across the board, haven’t had a single weird conversation. I’d recommend it.
Thank you. This is such a breath of fresh air. In all cases I prefer a simple answer, when organising an event with multiple people where I want to get ideas on numbers for planning.
• Yes - great! See you there
• No (with or without a reason) - fantastic! We’ve all got our own stuff going on or reasons why we don’t want to go!
• Maybe, with a reason why, or when you would be able to give an answer - cool!
• Maybe, with no further explanation - ugh. I’ll just assume you’re not coming and don’t care.
Maybe with no explanation is the cowards way out. Especially when “no sorry, I’m busy!” is the standard white lie.
“No because I don’t want to (don’t feel socially up to it)” is the hero’s response and I salute you 🫡
I’ve also found honesty to be the best way, with a few exceptions, like… because of my outward appearance and things thus assumed, a lot of people take my honesty -very- personally when really it has nothing to do with them.
But… that’s a really good reason for me to get them out of my life asap, so it kinda still works out.
I decided to stop making excuses a few years ago and just say when I’m not feeling socially up to it or there are too many people. Positive reactions literally across the board, haven’t had a single weird conversation. I’d recommend it.
Thank you. This is such a breath of fresh air. In all cases I prefer a simple answer, when organising an event with multiple people where I want to get ideas on numbers for planning.
• Yes - great! See you there
• No (with or without a reason) - fantastic! We’ve all got our own stuff going on or reasons why we don’t want to go!
• Maybe, with a reason why, or when you would be able to give an answer - cool!
• Maybe, with no further explanation - ugh. I’ll just assume you’re not coming and don’t care.
Maybe with no explanation is the cowards way out. Especially when “no sorry, I’m busy!” is the standard white lie.
“No because I don’t want to (don’t feel socially up to it)” is the hero’s response and I salute you 🫡
I’ve also found honesty to be the best way, with a few exceptions, like… because of my outward appearance and things thus assumed, a lot of people take my honesty -very- personally when really it has nothing to do with them.
But… that’s a really good reason for me to get them out of my life asap, so it kinda still works out.
John Frusciante has spoken!