A racist a transphobe and an antisemite walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says “aren’t you that girl who wrote HP?”

JQ Lolling stares unflinchingly ahead and states “Your teacher, Professor Eleazar Fig, dies at the end of Hogwarts Legacy. This happens in all possible endings and can’t be changed. Oh and Rookwood is the one who cursed Anne while the goblins were framed. Also, you’re also required to quell a slave uprising and you have no choice in the matter.”