I’m sure other people out there understand this, but like I’m such a sinkhole right now. I lost my job a few months ago, and I am trying so hard to get another one but its just not happening. I feel like I’m always hitting like 2nd or 3rd place in the lineup. The interviews go well, get call backs, then boom last minute they went with the other candidate. And everyone is telling me I’ll be okay cause they say I’m smart and have skills.
But it doesn’t matter, I’m broke, my medications running out, I’m tired, I have bills, everything hurts, I have no insurance, and I don’t want to be a leech and already my boyfriend has picked up the rent and stuff, but like he has his own bills.
I just don’t understand, why does shit have to keep happening, can’t it just settle for like 5 minutes so u can catch up. I feel like I haven’t been able to breath in years, and there is something that everyone else is in on that my autism doesn’t let me understand, and I’m just… idk anymore.
I’m bleh.
hug
🫂
So, in the fine tradition of using bananas for scale…
Bananas are slightly more radioactive than the background, due to potassium-40 content. So an informal unit of radiation measure in educational settings is the ‘banana-equivalent-dose’, which is about 0.1 microsieverts.
My particle spectrometer saw first light today, and I figure that I could use a banana to calibrate it. Then I noticed that K-40 undergoes a rare (0.001%) decay to 40Ar, emitting a positron. So not only is a banana a decent around-the-house radioisotope source, it’s also an antimatter source.
Truly a remarkable and versatile fruit.
This is some seriously dangerous information to be feeding me bro.
Now… to find magnets able to contain the antimatter…
Bananas are not typically very high on the danger scale except in exotic (and universally embarrassing) circumstances.
In fact, that’s another thing we could use bananas for scale with. Probably driving to work is equivalent to several kilobananas worth of danger daily :)
Anyway, I think the positron should be about 44keV if that helps you calibrate your magnets. The typical banana should produce something on the order of a positron every 10 seconds (although I used much rounding for the sake of brevity). Most commercial positron sources e.g. used in hospital PET scanners, are many times stronger than that!
exotic (and universally embarrassing) circumstances.
As someone who tried to push a banana up their ass in uni - it doesn’t work.
I/O error.
I understood the joy.
A couple of weeks ago my wife and I got jiggy for the first time in five years. After our third kid she just went completely off it and we’ve been in a dead bedroom situation ever since, she told me how she felt and despite my frustration I understood and respected her wishes. A couple of weeks ago I just opened up about how I was feeling unloved and then blam! It happened out of nowhere. I was in a daze and couldn’t believe it. Now I’m scared it’s going to be five years before it happens again.
I know this is just a thread to vent, but I really want you to focus on the fact that communicating how you felt helped the situation so much. Please don’t wait 5 more years to try that again.
From the way I read his comment, Im sure he communicated plenty.
I learned recently how the James Webb Space Telescope is not orbiting around Earth but literally orbiting around an empty point in space. I don’t think I even quite understand it, but it’s really cool
For everyone who immediately thinks ‘it’s most likely orbiting a point within the earth,’ here’s a diagram to help:
Have no idea how this works… there is no gravitational pull at the L2 point, it’s just an empty point in space 🤨.
There is gravitational pull, from both the Earth and the Sun. The JWST is orbiting the “earth-sun system” if you will.
So they solved the Three Body Problem?
It’s not really a three body problem. For that, the gravity of the JWST would have to affect the other two bodies, but its gravity is negligible.
JWST isn’t going in circles, it’s orbiting the sun. If you look at it relative to that, then it looks more like a sine wave rather than going in circles. However from the perspective of the earth, it looks like it’s going in circles
You’re tell me bro. I need to research this more.
Maybe gravitational push-pull between planets and moons… IDK, it might be some sweet spot they discovered where gravitational forces do weird things, lol 😂.
Yeah but it’s not at the L2 point, it’s spinning in a circle around L2.
Yes, my point exactly. There is no mass at the L2 point, so how can it spin around it.
Others explained it though, it makes sense now 👍.
PS: What are enbies 🤨?
A Lagrange point or whatever?
Now I got that ZZ Top intro ear-worm…
why doesn’t Radiohead put out an entire album of songs like pulk/pull revolving doors? they had a really unique and cohesive idm sound going and kinda dropped it to the side
Ok ok. Unexpected comment. Respect.
How it feels to never have had anyone in my life that I could just randomly call up and talk about happy and sad things with.
If you’re really set out on doing this I’d gladly make the call
I miss the silence of empty rooms.
I developed tinnitus earlier this year, and now I’m never gonna be able to just sit somewhere quiet and far away from everyone else and be alone with my thoughts. This ringing will follow me everywhere, drowning out the distant sounds of cars disturbing puddles in distant streets on a rainy night, obscuring all the subtle little noises that danced on the edges of my perception. But most of all robbing me of any truly quiet moment for the rest of my life.
Condolences. I have a rain sound app on my phone. With earphones and practice, I can sometimes focus on that sound instead of the tinnitus, and get some semblance of peace and sanity.
I might have to try that, thank you.
This is not advice, because if I had heard this posted as advice in my first year or two of tinitus I would have been pissed at the person giving it. Also, to a very large degree even your emotional reaction to this is not something you can control.
I was absolutely devastated and hated myself when I got tinitus. I and a co-worker teaching international folk dance were invited to a dance party / concert.
Amazing band, flown in from another continent, but I knew it would be too loud. I’ve always had minor hyperacusis and been very concerned about protecting my hearing. Before the party started I offered disposable earplugs to my co-worker, she declined. I had my own pair, in my pocket, the entire night. For some reason I never put them on.
At the end of the night I leave the venue and have terrible ringing in my ears. I freaked the fuck out, and kept everything as quiet as possible for the rest of the night and the next day to try to allow my ears to heal. Immense guilt and kicking myself. And fear.
The ringing never stopped. Saw an audiologist, who said it would definitely go away in a few weeks. It did not.
Tried supplements that did seem to reduce the volume of the ringing (Lipoflavinoid. No idea if it was all placebo or not).
Saw many more specialists and eventually met one (more than a year later) that told me (no idea if current studies back this up) that sometimes Tinitus is not physical damage at all, and that it’s damage in the way that our brains process the input from our ears.
He recommended that I “try not to think about it”. Said that sometimes even helps the ringing decrease. I told him that I was not the type of person who could ever not think about it. Nor did I want to be. Exactly the opposite, I had pledged to myself to never just not notice it. Saying that now doesn’t really make sense to me, but at the time it absolutely did. It was an integral part of my self-image.
So, I religiously took Lipoflavinoid every day for more than a year. Normally with my ADHD I would struggle with that, but every time I forgot it I would notice the ringing getting louder and remember.
Then, maybe two or three years in I would sometimes forget to take Lipoflavinoid and… Not notice. I still hadn’t heard a second of silence for 3 years, but I didn’t notice the volume increase.
Eventually I was forgetting it more often than not and didn’t want to keep the hassle and pay for it so I just stopped.
Work got difficult and I would have other things to think about than the ringing, and every one in a while there were days where at the end of the day I would realize I hadn’t noticed the ringing at all. (If I had that realization in a quiet room, I’d immediately start noticing it again)
I gave up trying to fix it. I managed to convince myself that accepting it did not go against the fiber of my self concept, and my experience got better.
It’s been more than 10 years since that concert and I can say that I haven’t been bothered by the ringing in years, and I’m in a relatively quiet room typing this out now and don’t hear it.
Again, not advice. I can’t tell you to “just ignore it”, and if you’re like me you can’t make yourself do that even if you wanted.
If you’re early in your experience with tinitus, maybe it will be helpful to hear that at least for one person, it got better. And that by “it” I mostly mean my experience of life with tinitus, moreso than the ringing itself “going away”.
If anyone has read this far, fun fact that kind of goes against the general gist of this narrative:
Once I had tinitus I realized that I could be a surprisingly accurate and precise human drcibal meter by comparing perceived volume of my ringing to perceived volume of the environment.
Could get within about 3db in the range from 40 to 75 without earplugs, at which point I would put in earplugs and know how much to adjust to get the same precision up to 100db.
I generally refuse on moral grounds to participate in activities above 95db without all participants strictly being required to use ear protection.
Anything above 80, I set up a small table with free earplugs, even if I’m not the organizer…
Also, I haven’t really tried to measure db this way in a few years. Don’t know if I still can or not.
For what it’s worth, I do find this somewhat reassuring.
I don’t know if I’ll ever get to where you are, but to hear that it could get better does make me feel a little less shitty.
Thank you.
It’s brutal. It also just kind of becomes normal, eventually. Do what you can to protect your hearing going forward to prevent it from getting worse. Good luck.
Agreed. To me, the ringing is just what silence sounds like now after 15 years of the ringing. Mine isn’t very bad, so I only really hear it in quiet spaces, but I protect my hearing as much as possible now to prevent it from getting worse.
I have a distant sibling that I’ve been building a relationship with over long distance. Saw them in-person and realized that they have quite a few toxic traits from one of our narcissistic parents. I don’t know what to do now. I’m pretty traumatized from that parent and my sibling doesn’t see any of it as a negative. I don’t think I have the ability to open their eyes on it, either. I want the relationship I thought we had.
I’m contemplating whether it would be “cleaner” to leave my Debian system exactly the way it is after the default installation and add all additional software as flatpaks, or if I should let the package manager handle all installations even if I have to add third party repositories for it, or if I should strip it down to a base system with just the core of Gnome and use flatpaks for all userspace programs, or simply do without software that isn’t in the Debian repos…
Yes, I’m autistic, how did you guess?
Yeah… Flatpaks are nice, but slow and sometimes broken (I guess mostly depending on how the rest of your system looks like.) On the other hand, I hate adding 3rd party repositories; it feels weird and messy. It’s a complex matter indeed.
I’m in love with an old friend. I’m married. I have two children.
It still feels right.
Are you gonna divorce for your friend?
I have decided to assume that OP is already married to said old friend, and has two kids with said old friend. His marriage to this old friend just feels right.
Let’s just leave it like that, it’s more wholesome.
Ope.
I know for a fact this friend wouldn’t take me.
Did you ask them recently?
No need, she told me herself.
I’ve been dealing with this back pain under my right shoulder blade for like 6 years or so and I can’t seem to figure out what’s causing it or how to treat it. I think it’s called “rhomboid pain”. I’ve seen a doctor once and physical therapist twice and the best they can do is recommend I stretch and go get a massage. Yeah thanks guys. Totally haven’t tried any of that.
I’ve always had a bad posture but it’s been getting better yet the pain has gotten worse so I don’t think it’s that. I doubt it’s weight lifting either because I had been lifting for almost 10 years before the pain appeared and taking a break doesn’t make it better and lifting heavy doesn’t make it worse. I don’t think it’s mountain biking either because the pain started before I bought my bike. I also got a new bed, tried different pillows, tried sleeping on my back, pillow under my knees. Sleeping on both sides with a pillow between my legs. Nothing. Also it’s rarely bad in the mornings but rather on the evenings.
Well - it’s still early to say, but I have a new idea what might be causing it and I think this might actually be it. I think it’s because I switched from a desktop computer to laptop. It perfectly correlates with the time I started experiencing this pain. I now sit for hours and hours every day with my right hand extended to reach the trackpad. It has to be that. I now switched to mouse and a keyboard and let’s see if that makes a difference. Only been doing that for few days now but I have zero pain right now.
I have had chest discomfort for decades. I’m 46 and it started when I was about 25. Doctors never found anything. I’m lucky to have good benefits and have been going to masseuses for over 10 years.
A couple of years ago tried a new masseuse mentioned the tightness and she found a huge lump of scar tissue she massaged out. I’m still not perfect but I’m light-years better.
My point is, get a massage and never give up. You just need to find the right person to find it.
Yep. I even got this back when cleaners moved my mouse from in front of key keyboard spacebar to the right of the keypad, until I noticed what had happened.
I put my mouse between my body and the keyboard and it goes away.
Good luck!
rhomboid pain
I had this from having my shoulders curled in while working as well as sleeping on my side. I was picking fruit which requires lots of reaching. Try to be aware of keeping your shoulders square and get a friend to jam their elbow in there and grind it out.
Yeah I’m a side sleeper aswell and my bad posture includes shoulders curled in. I’ve been meaning to get one of those elastic things that’s supposed to pull my shoulders back. It’s interesting when sitting against a backrest or using a foam roller my shoulder blades don’t feel symmetrical. Like the right one is sticking out more.
Track pads suck, I hope this solve your problem
I was getting something similar a few months back and it’s funny you mention a laptop because I started using one around the time my pain appeared, I think I was a bad knot in my muscle, I helped it go away by lying down on a tennis ball and massaging it out, hope ya find some relief dude.
For anyone wanting to try this tennis ball thing, that might not give you enough of what you’re looking for. Lacrosse balls offer less resistance and more pressure
Dude, that’s exactly what it is. I get the exact same pain when I’m editing on my laptop. I swapped out for a trackball myself. I can type all day long because I can get things set up to eliminate that strain, but editing takes a lot more awkward movement using the trackpad.
I like a trackpad, they’re convenient as heck, but they just aren’t good for sustained use imo.
I hope the new keyboard and mouse do the trick! I also was experiencing wrist/arm/shoulder pain after I started working primarily on a laptop. I got a split keyboard that i can angle in a more ergonomic manner, and that single change cleared my pain up. Repetitive stress injuries suck. and I hope you find relief with your new work setup.
It probably doesn’t help that I’m also literally sitting in front of my dining table on a shitty chair, but it’s not like I had some super ergonomic computer station before either. I really hope this helps because otherwise I’m out of ideas.
I would definitely suggest getting a good chair. Being able to adjust the height and stuff is really important, especiallyfor shoulder pain. Take a look at used gaming chairs and/or keep an eye out for recently discontinued models at brick-and-mortar office supply stores (mine was super cheap because they only had the floor model left).
Do you keep your wallet in your back pocket when sitting?
Nope. Thanks though.
There’s a part of me that really wants something to take over my body or replace myself with an entirely different person who does all of the things I struggle with. Even if it wasn’t a person, if it did work and made my family and friends proud then I could stop struggling.
Oof.
I feel this all to well.
I highly recommend reading https://www.strugglecare.com/book .
It’s not self-help. It’s not going to “fix” you.
But reading it was some of the best therapy I’ve ever received. If you’re at all like me, maybe it will help you too. I am happier, as are the people I love and who love me, in large part because of K.C. Davis’ philosophy. (The people I love and who love me are also very empathetic and understanding, which I know is definitely not true for most people unfortunately).
It’s less than $20.
It’s short.
Buy it. If you can’t afford it, I might even be willing to buy it for you / venmo you $20 to get it.
Also available in your library / Libby.
Also available as an audiobook.
if it did work and made my family and friends proud then I could stop struggling.
Why can’t they be proud that you are happy? Why do you need them to be proud of you? It sounds like they are projecting their desires/dreams on to you. You could be honest with them and tell them you aren’t happy trying to make them proud the way they want. You want them to be proud of you for being you. Or you could ghost your family and friends who sound like they want you to be someone you don’t want to be.
This is kinda similar to the plot of the show “Severance.”
Maybe not nobody but most…
The freedom and control and depth and enjoyment in using Linux. I know, I know, shut up I’m answering the question.
There was a question here recently about partitioning, and that got me thinking about inodes and really wanting to understand how data storage works. I went on a deep dive and learnt so much. I feel like I have a real deep understanding of how my system works now.
People don’t understand how wonderful it is to have mastery over things. Most people are just consumers of a thing. I do my own motorbike and car maintenance, and I know where my limits are in terms of skill and equipment. It’s so satisfying, it brings a sense of joy and accomplishment to my life.
I’m baffled that people just… don’t do this kind of thing. Don’t learn about metabolic pathways or companion planting or do careful research and just impulse buy… Like… Life must suck for them. It must be so dam boring to live life like that.
So yeah, I don’t think many people understand that.
I’m the kinda guy who’s aware of how cool Linux and system mastery can be, but also the kinda guy who’s too lazy to care enough about maintaining a dual boot Linux/Windows system so every other year I’ll install a new Linux distro I haven’t used before only to do nothing with it and delete that partition of my hard drive within a month.
Last week I installed Ubuntu!
Eh, time and effort is limited depending on what the matter at hand is. Sometimes, you are required to just impulse buy or not live at all.
… And yet, I know exactly what you mean. There’s a class of people who just live with a phone for nearly everything they do 14 hours of their daily life, day in day out, 12 months a year. No rest whatsoever. And yet, the moment they find any resistance anywhere in their life, not even on something related to the phone, they just. dont. google. They literally refuse to help themselves and will just do what they know and refuse to do or even concern themselves with better.
I’ve seen a 20-year-old who, when asked to give in their homework on Moodle, like normal people do, instead… wrote everything on a Mac’s Notes app, took a photo and then pestered people for the teacher’s phone number so they could send the shitty photo of their homework on a very popular chat application. When told that this was not going to count, they just shrugged and stopped caring. Again, they used technology daily. That was objectively the stupidest and laziest “functional” person I’ve ever met, a true sheep, and I fear ever becoming like them during onset of dementia.
People don’t understand how wonderful it is to have mastery over things.
I have so many areas of my life that I think in terms of a skill, one of which is Linux, which I’m using now. Another is coffee/espresso, cycling, writing, etc.
Basically all hobbies. But the point is that I can develop mastery at my own pace in so many different areas. Sometimes, it’s slow and methodical, like coffee: I’ll try something new maybe every weeks. And sometimes it’s breakneck speed, like Linux…just do a deep dive and come out knowing a bunch of new stuff.
I fucking love being alive.
For me, it’s homebrewing. I think this can keep my interest long enough to get through winter depression. That’s good enough.
I am in 100% agreement with you. I’m kind of in the same mindset in figuring out my homelab setup. Still learning docker and how volumes work 😢 haha
I’m in academia but I like to tinker with tech. So when my students or co-workers are surprised that I know so much about tech and how to navigate around most computer systems and troubleshoot (Mac/Windows/Linux) they are perplexed. They ask why I didn’t major in tech. I tell them that I majored in what I loved (history) and play with tech as a hobby to relax.
It’s why I selfhost my own Lemmy server. Gives me something to do with my hobby, keeps me focused on what’s new in tech, makes me learn to keep up with docker, Linux, editing CRON tabs etc.
It takes time and effort though, and usually that time and effort is spent elsewhere, especially if you’re an adult with two jobs and two kids. When you don’t have to think to better your mastery of your surroundings, making good hardware/software choices becomes increasingly disparate
Yeah. My appreciation for Linux has recently grown a lot. It just seems like the Web and tech companies really are going to shit.
I’m old enough that being free from ads and spying is far more important to me then anything windows can offer.
My PhD thesis
This is actually something that people are intended to understand by design.
Same lmaoooo
Converting a high resolution photo scanner into a large format digital camera
There’s a lot that goes into it and I’m still fairly early in the process but it is possible and has been done before
I already have some lenses that will cover the whole scanner bed, it’s mostly a question of power at this point
only thing i don’t understand about it is why are you dong this
Perhaps a huge sensor like that is good for night/astrophotography
Not so much really, it would be more capable for like landscapes and architecture due to the time frame it’d take pictures in
so you’re really trading long exposure time + large size for extremely high resolution, that’s pretty cool actually
Please do update us on your progress! This is really fascinating
Once I finish it I’ll be sharing information about it and pictures it takes on multiple photography groups across Lemmy
Will that not just result in a terrible camera…? O.o
Surprisingly no
Such scanners can scan at incredibly high resolution
Hundreds of Megapixels in fact
The main thing the time it takes to scan the image is quite high, like 30 seconds or do
Edit: Here’s an example photo from someone who did what I’m talking about.
That’s actually pretty fascinating, thanks.
Wow, that’s beautiful. Best of luck!
